Fire 🔥, MID 😐, or Trash 🗑️?: AEW Rampage Match Review 5/5/23

THIS IS THE FINAL ITERATION OF THIS VERSION OF Fire 🔥, MID 😐, or Trash 🗑️

Lucha Bros & El Hijo Del Vikingo vs Powerhouse Hobbs, QT Marshall, & Aaron Solo

Headline: “Is QTV dragging Powerhouse Hobbs down?”

Result: Lucha Bros & El Hijo Del Vikingo win via pinfall

Verdict: FIRE 🔥

Editor’s Note: Much like the majority of the stables in AEW, I have no clue why Hobbs is aligned with the QTV crew. This match was really good, never mind my dislike for QT Marshall and his cronies. The Lucha Bros and Vikingo are almost always certain to produce great matches regardless of the opponent.

Jade Cargill vs Enhancement Talent

Undefeated TBS Champion @Jade_Cargill is in action on #AEWRampage on TNT! pic.twitter.com/EiYSV90AG6

— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) May 5, 2023

Headline: “Smfh”.

Result: Jade Cargill wins via pinfall

Verdict: Trash 🗑️

Quick work for the TBS Champion @Jade_cargill who remains undefeated at 57-0!

Watch #AEWRampage on TNT! pic.twitter.com/WJIdlpRgWe

— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) May 5, 2023

Editor’s Note: How did I know there would be an established talent squash an enhancement talent on AEW Rampage. Maybe because they do it every single week.

Mark Briscoe vs Preston Vance

Mark Briscoe @sussexCoChicken makes his way to the ring to face @pres10Vance here on #AEWRampage on TNT! pic.twitter.com/mEL1SVeicR

— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) May 5, 2023

Headline: “Mark does Jay proud in a win against Preston Vance”.

Result: Mark Briscoe wins via pinfall

Verdict: FIRE 🔥

Editor’s Note: This match was awesome. I really wish this was on dynamite instead of Rampage..

The Firm Deletion

Headline: “The Hardys, Hook, & Cassidy own alternate reality”.

Result: The Hardys, Hook, & Cassidy win

Verdict: MID 😐

Editor’s Note: I know to expect a fair amount of corniness in matches that take place at the Hardy compound, so I always suspend belief during these matches. The first thing that stood out is how a kidnapped and killed Isiah Cassidy somehow found his way to participating in this match. Stokely was SUPER funny. Orgasmic Isiah Cassidy was probably the cringiest thing I ever seen. These things are always entertaining but in my opinion, Matt Hardy hasn’t been able to recapture the Deletion matches from Impact. AEW best be advised to never let Matt Hardy do this shit again.

Crimson Mask